Okay… Hey, guys.

Sooo, I’m writing the two game recaps simultaneously. Well, “back to back” might be the better usage. Anyhoo…

WHAT THE HELL WERE THOSE TWO GAMES?!

Those were two of the weirdest baseball games I’ve ever seen. 30 total runs were scored in Game 1, followed by 20 in Game 2. Still crazy.

For a few brief moments on Saturday, I thought about the slim possibility of the MLB “rigging” the game…in order for the London crowd to see a gazillion runs, and begin to love baseball.

When I sobered up, both literally and figuratively, I started to believe that all the pitchers were out of their comfort zone. Whether it was the fact that it wasn’t a real baseball field, whether they couldn’t adjust their depth perception, or whether the grounders were screaming across the field AT a crazy, fast pace. The point remains the same.

This series was bonkers. Absurd. Bananalands. All of the above.

We won the first game…17 to 13.
WE SCORED MORE RUNS THAN THE SUPER BOWL SCORE COMBINED.

I don’t get it.

The detective in me wants to keep trying to attempt to explain what transpired. For your sakes though, I’ll shut the fuck up and just recap the game.

We laid a SIX SPOT on the Red Sox in the top of the first inning, and morale was riding high.

Side note: It was super bizarre to see our guys rocking pinstripes as the ‘away’ team, but I understand that the MLB wanted to broadcast our best jerseys.

After a single by DJ and a walk to Gary, #MYFirstBaseman ripped a RBI double. Attaboy, Lukey.

AND THE HITS KEPT COMIN.

2 run double for Sir Didi, RBI double for Eddie E…and the cherry on top of the first inning sundae.

HICKSY 2 RUN YABO.

6-0 lead. Tanaka on the bump. Everything was looking fantastic. And then…it all went to shit.

Single-RBI double-walk-walk-pop out-sac fly-RBI single-THREE RUN HOMER-fuck.

Much like what we did to Rick Porcello in the top half, the Sox bats absolutely lit Tanaka the FUCK up. This was what started the “these pitchers are out of their element” speculation. Because that was abundantly clear.

At this point, everyone basically geared up for a ’21-20′ type of game.

Chaddy “Is it the Chad?” Green came in and weather the storm for the next two innings, giving us enough to throw a Gardy Party.

GARDY 2 RUN HOMER AND WE’RE BACK ON TOP. CHEERIO.

And the runs kept coming in the 4th inning, baby. After a double by #MYFirstBaseman, a walk to Sir Didi, and a single by Gley Bay Bay, Gardy got another chance to shine…RBI WALK!

DJ “This Guy Actually Might Be a Machine” cleared the bases with a 3 run double, padding his RISP stats sheet, and proving that Cashman was a fucking genius for signing him.

For good measure, Aaron “What a Guy, What a Guy” Judge added a 2 run YABO, jsut for good measure.

14-6.

Moving into the 5th, after a solid inning by David “Boring, Yet Effective” Hale, we added THREE more runs. A RBI single by Didi, and a 2 run single by DJ LM On That Beat…holy shit, this dude really is a machine.

17-6.

Now, this should have been end of story – pretty much, right? WRONG.

Like I said, this series was bananalands.

In the 6th, Nestor Cortes “Not Ken Griffey” Jr unloaded a solo shot to JBJ…no big deal with that one. BUT…in the 7th, the British soccer pitch started to curse us some more. Like I said, the pitchers were all outta whack in this soccer trap!

A pair of singles off Nestor and then boom – 3 run shot. He then was pulled after giving up another base hit. Unluckily for us, Tommy K was NOT ready to pitch across the pond:

Walk-wild pitch-RBI single-RBI walk-RBI double.

17-13.

We let these assholes cut the lead to four. WE WERE UP BY ELEVEN.

Don’t worry though, folks. We took care of it…but you already know that, don’t ya? *puts sunglasses on*

Agent Zero Ottavino struggled a little bit in the 8th, but Zack ‘With a K’ bailed him out. Classic Chappie came in for the 9th and…of course…gave up a single.
BUT, an inning ending double play, and an amazing by Didi the Knight, gave us the 17-3 win. What a fucking game.

What an improbable, odd, shocking, never-ending game.

4 hours and 42 minutes. The Over hit in the first inning.

Oh, and #MYFirstBaseman was 4 for 4 before trying to stretch a single into a double, and straining his abs.

DON’T WORRY, THOUGH. HE’S OK…I THINK.

But, holy shit. This game was cray-cray.

Good thing we got to do the same thing on Sunday!!

~~~

Game 2 recap coming up right now!

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