Andddd, here’s the continuation of my thoughts from the Game 2 recap.

Here’s a plan!

Yankees-White Sox begins in about 5 hours. Let’s run through this game REAL QUICK, pop a couple of the Forget-Me-Now pills from Arrested Development, wipe this series from our consciousness, and beat up on the White Sox?

If you don’t have any of these pills handy, maybe bash your head against a wall three or four times? Just to make sure the Astros series has faded from your mind. Orrr, slam your head into a car door – that would probably work, as well.

Once again, we got off to an early lead at Minute Maid Park. Maybe it’s just clever advertising, but every time I hear their stadium’s name, it makes me want some damn juice. Well done, Astros. Well done.

Anyways, Gardy Party was this game’s award winner of “1st-Inning-Solo-Shot-But-It-Doesn’t-Matter-Because-We-Are-Still-Going-To-Get-Swept.”

Nice shot though, Gardy!

I don’t know about you guys, but I’m getting really fucking tired of James Paxton pitching badly. If he turns into this year’s Sonny Gray, I’m going to bodycheck a DJ. Of course, that is my go-to joking line, but I’m still very annoyed by this guy.

Former stud who played for a small market AL West team, getting traded to the Yankees. Both from small cities (Paxton – Delta, Canada. Sonny – Nashville).

Please don’t turn into Sonny, Pax. Please, please, please.

I’m not even going to sweet out the Pardon My Take “Sorrey” gif today. I’m drawing the line there. Is deporting Paxton to Canada a potential option? Let’s keep that in mind!

He gave up a solo shot to Altuve (this dude MURKED us in this series) and then a RBI triple – real fucking quick.

His final stat line was shitty:

4 IP, 8 hits, 5 ER, 3 walks, 5 Ks.

Altuve ended up hitting a 2nd dinger off Paxton. Later, Correa took Tommy K deep with a 2 run shot. When the bleeding was finally done, we were losing 7-2 (thanks to a DJ ‘Khaled’ LeMahieu sacrifice fly).

In classic 2019 Yankees fashion, we tried to claw our way back only to take another L.

Luke hit a 2 run bomb.

#MYFirstBaseman is still doing his thing.

Our best hitter (wow, that is weird to type), DJ “DJ On that Beat” LeMahieu had a RBI double, followed by a Clint The Wildling sac fly.

Of course, I sensed the writing on the wall. Not to brag, but I’m a bit of psychic, guys. I displayed this gift of nature during Opening Day, when I called Luke’s 3 run bomb. I basically called it again.

Not trying to brag, but I’m kind of a big deal.

Yeahhhh. We lost 8-6

27-year-old Joe “Matt” Harvey was one of the lone bright spots in this game. Making his MLB debut, he pitched 2 shutout innings, giving up only 1 hit, and striking out 3. He looked goooood. Keep it up, Joe. Sorry for comparing you to Matt Harvey.

I’m going to start brainstorming some good nicknames for ya. Lock it in.

Okay, the shitty game recaps are over.



Follow me on twitter @JohnFerraro_

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